The Progressive Puppy

Camp Movies Moments VI - Before Troll 2

I love cheesy old films, the older and cheesier the better.  Honestly, I can watch B-movies until my eyes bleed ketchup.

Art and I recently rented Michael Stephenson's documentary "Best Worst Movie" about the creation of Troll 2, a low-budget horror flick many cinephiles consider the crappiest movie ever made.  Stephenson, who as a youngster appeared in the cult classic, succeeds in his critically-acclaimed portrayal of slipshod filmmaking during Hollywood's post-Ed Wood era. 

The fact is, there have always been movies as execrable as Troll 2, feature-length productions both appalling and curiously appealing.  Those of us who appreciate the sheer awfulness of these cinematic misfires embrace each clumsy scene with the religious fervor of Pastor Joel Osteen spreading his homophobia on Oprah.  We watch them through the pain.

As we learn from the lives of Catholic saints and early Christian martyrs, there is a certain point where suffering is elevated to sublime ecstasy.  Consider Polycarp of Smyrna, Blessed Thérèse, Jeanne d'Arc, Colton from Survivor.

The following films transport me into raptures.  Like Bernadette Soubirous, ridiculed for glimpsing the Blessed Virgin on a garbage heap even as her young bones were being ravaged by cancer, I also have experienced otherworldly bliss.  My agonizing visions and subsequent exaltation, however, are derived from celluloid garbage.  My Lady of Lourdes wears Joan Crawford fuck-me pumps and enough hairspray to calcify a moose.   

Percy B. Shelley's Ozymandias proclaims: "Look upon my works, ye Mighty, and despair!"  

Behold!  Despair!  Look upon the works of "B Picture" geniuses Edward Bernds and Roger Corman ...

a.)  Zsa Zsa Gabor stars as Queen of Outer Space, which cinecaprepictures effectively condenses into a 2-minute clip. 
b.)  If you're performing some mindless task and would like another mindless task to keep that first task in perspective, check out Susan Cabot as The Wasp Woman.  The entire film is presented here via Matte Havoc's channel.

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Kirk Cameron, Rewriting History with Fake Scholar David Barton

Former child TV star turned evangelical fanatic Kirk Cameron, not content with presenting Creationist fairy tales as facts, blaming Darwin for the Holocaust, and trashing committed same-sex couples, is now busily spreading the revisionist history of David Barton and other opponents of church-state separation.  The vehicle for transporting already-deluded fundies even further into La La Land is an upcoming documentary propaganda film called "Monumental."

Julie Ingersoll reports for Religion Dispatches:  When Kirk Cameron appeared in the post-rapture Left Behind movies he depicted mainstream evangelicalism.  Viewed as a wholesome presence in the entertainment industry and profiled in Christianity Today in 2008, his stock rose even further among mainstream evangelicals with the popular Christian film Fireproof (which, not surprisingly, was panned by most critics but embraced by the Religious Right). ... With a new film Monumental about to be released, there is a new, more extreme Cameron who is increasingly connected to Christian Reconstruction and dominion theology. When evangelicals go to the theaters next week to see the star of the popular Christian films mentioned above, what they’ll get is the “providential history” of RJ Rushdoony and David Barton ...  Cameron recently returned from the Reconstructionist-inspired San Antonio Independent Christian Film Festival hosted by Doug Phillips and Vision Forum where he and Phillips discussed the theological background to the version of American history presented in the film, showing the subtle influence of Christian Reconstructionism and R.J. Rushdoony’s Biblical Philosophy of History.  Cameron tapped into contemporary tea party memes about slavery, which are rooted in Rushdoony, and whether or not the president is a Christian...  “They (the puritans) had a king that had bankrupted the nation, tripled the debt enslaving the people - in essence, claiming to be God on earth as he sat in the church and rammed religion down the throats of the people, claiming to be a Christian,” he said.

It would make sense that ultraconservative Obama-haters like Cameron and Barton would want to recreate history to reflect the American Taliban's theocratic agenda.  It's also predictable that they would attack serious scholars and attempt to insert their whitewashed depiction of the past - and I do mean WHITE and WASHED - into the nation's schools. 

In the following video Talk2Action's Chris Rodda, Senior Research Director for MRFF, counters some of the absurd claims in Cameron's new movie.  Notice Kirk's awed expression when Barton is spinning his fables.  I wonder if the actor wears that same look of astonishment while watching reruns of his shopworn sitcom Growing Pains.

Behold the carnage of logic and fact-based information.  (Kool-Aid Christians may want to avert their eyes.)

RELATED POST:  David Barton Is Insane Update
RELATED POST:  The Gasping Fish

Roger Ebert and Many Others Slam MPAA Over "Bully" Rating

Fallout continues over the inflexible (not to mention outdated) attitudes of those "moral" arbitrators at the Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA) who have been receiving well-deserved criticism for saddling Harvey Weinstein's gritty documentary "Bully" with an "R" rating.  As it's being noted by equality advocates, a "Restricted" rating means that the youngsters most likely to be victimized in our public schools will probably not be allowed to see this important film.

Acclaimed critic Roger Ebert, never one to mince language, bluntly observes in his online journal: 

Hey, kids!  Anybody here not heard the F-word? .... If a director wants to make a film against bullying, it is not for a committee of MPAA bean-counters to tell him what words he can use.  Not many years ago, the word rape was not used in newspapers, on television--or in the movies, for that matter.  But there is a crime, and the name of the crime is rape, and if you remove the word you help make the crime invisible.   This is yet another example of the MPAA sidestepping ethical judgments by falling back on the technicalities of its guidelines.  It is even more insidious because the MPAA never clearly spells out its guidelines, leaving it to filmmakers to guess--although they often judge by past experience.

Adeline Lambert writes on PolicyMic.com: 

A recent petition on Change.org to urge the MPAA to change its rating of “Bully” has reached more than 340,000 signatures, and many celebrities have spoken out against the R-rating, including Ellen DeGeneres, Meryl Streep, Johnny Depp, and Justin Bieber, as well as 20 members of Congress.  The movie was given an R-rating primarily because of language. According to the parental guide on the Internet Movie Database, there is no nudity, and no appearance of alcohol or drugs. There is a discussion of suicide, but very little violence. The assignment of an R-rating to a movie so important to kids highlights the hypocrisy often involved in MPAA ratings. Movies with violence, gore, sex, and nudity are often assigned PG-13 ratings, but when it comes to the profanity that is heard every day in schools, the MPAA takes a hard stance. One Change.org petitioner commented, “Why is it that a violent movie can get a PG-13 rating, but a movie aimed at curbing violence gets an R [rating]?” It seems especially ironic that “Hunger Games,” a movie about teenagers engaging in a group death match, has received a PG-13 rating.

For an up-close and personal look at the inconsistant political agenda behind the MPAA, you should watch Kirby Dick's 2006 scathing exposé This Film Is Not Yet Rated, which explains the movie ratings system in America.

Below is an amusing trailer for Dick's documentary ...

(Hat Tip: Towleroad)

"Christian" Rotten Banana Awards Promote Anti-Gay Hatred

Chelsea Schilling, who like a weeping pustule oozes ultraconservative propaganda at World Net Daily, reports that Ted Baehr, self-proclaimed media critic and defender of "traditional values," has announced his "Rotten Banana Awards" for films that most offend narrow-minded bigots like himself and Ms. Schilling.

Dictionary.com bookmarked on her every online apparatus, this anemic Ann Coulter wannabe declares: 

Sex, homosexual affairs, heavy drinking, gruesome violence and anti-human and anti-God themes – it’s all featured in the film receiving the Vile, Vulgar & Anti-Christian Award and dubbed Worst Ultimate Christian Bashing Movie of the Year.  Dr. Ted Baehr, media critic and founder and publisher of Movieguide, named Kevin Smith’s “Red State” the worst movie of 2011. The film heads his list of the 20 Most Unbearable Movies of 2011, each receiving the Annual Rotten Banana Awards.  (To accompany her article, Schilling posts a vivid photo of a rotting banana so readers will know just how disgusting "real Christians" think these movies are.  Granted, the aforementioned "Red State" may not be the most subtle film you'll see this decade - but for those with a dark sense of humor and firsthand knowledge of evangelical extremists, it is entertaining.)  Other films earning the disgraceful designation include: “Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star,” which won the Slimy Pornification Award for its lewdness; “A Good Old Fashioned Orgy,” which received the Abhorrent Sexcapade Award; “The Skin I Live In,” which earned the Lurid Transgender Award; and “Happy Feet Two,” which was given the Environmentalist Hysteria Award.  (Fundie fanatics reject the idea of climate change resulting from our nation's dependence on coal and fossil fuels.  They figure their Deity would never allow that to happen.)

Things you can count on while perusing Teddy Baehr's "Rotten Banana Awards" list:  Any film that doesn't present LGBT Americans as skulking predators, sex addicts, suffering AIDS patients, child molesters, or self-loathing druggies will not find favor with Baehr and his pious posse.  (And if Rick Santorum wins the presidency, this magnate of morality could be appointed director of the FCC.  That prospect alone should send progressives running to the polls in November.) 

Baehr hated the Oscar-winning film "Beginners" because of "loud and proud homosexual activism."  (Plot: After devoting over fifty years of his life to an opposite-sex spouse, now deceased, Christopher Plummer comes out of the closet to his adult son. Scandalous!)  Teddy absolutely loathed the independent film "Pariah" due to its supposed "anti-Christian liberal perversion."  (This gem of a movie takes a sympathetic look at a black lesbian teenager coping with her judgmental Bible-thumping mother.)  He hated the sci-fi comedy  "Paul" for its "atheistic worldview" (the title character is a sentient being from another planet), and the action flick "Rampart" received his "Lying About The Police" award because the story deals with dirty cops which of course don't exist in Tea Party Universe.

You probably wouldn't be surprised to learn that Christian values hypocrites hold their own version of the Academy Awards, attended by such D-List luminaries as Kirk Cameron, Pat Boone, Dean Cain, and Kevin Sorbo (shown above with his life-like wife Samantha.)  The 2012 Faith and Values Awards selected the movie "Courageous" (aka Police Who Pray) for the group's highest honor.  Although the majority of America's law enforcement officers are dedicated and compassionate, those pepper-spraying, homophobic, corrupt, sadistic, Taser-happy cops who find spiritual comfort in fundamentalism can rest assured that thanks to the FAVA, their reputation for decency is also being upheld.

(Pictured Top:  Chelsea Schilling, Ted Baehr, the Sorbos)

"In God We Teach" - Threatening School Kids with Hell

“He did everything in his power to make sure that you could go to heaven, so much so that he took your sins on his own body, suffered your pains for you, and he’s saying, ‘Please, accept me, believe.’ If you reject that, you belong in hell.”  - David Paszkiewicz, high school teacher preaching to a captive audience his class

I hope you'll take a moment and watch this trailer for an upcoming documentary about proselytizing in the public school system.  The film focuses on a lawsuit brought against a New Jersey history teacher named David Paszkiewicz, who used abused his position of authority to promote his fundamentalist religious views to students.  (Here in rural Texas, evangelical indoctrination in the classroom is more common than Baptist pastors laying hands on prostitutes or the TDCJ executing innocent and mentally challenged prisoners - and that, pardner, is saying something.  Still, one would like to think that the Garden State is more enlightened than a place where Rick Perry keeps getting elected governor.)

From the film's official website:  While the average American is familiar with the concept of “separation of church and state,” just how many understand what is legal and what is not when it comes to the public school classroom? What are the rules? Who can say what? Does God’s law trump civil law? “In God We Teach” explores the blurred lines between personal belief, religious dogma and civil law through the eyes of an average, blue-collar American town.

Republican Lawmakers Authorize the Arrest of Filmmaker

This morning Republican legislators, presumably acting on the wishes of their corporate masters in the energy industry, ordered the arrest of respected filmmaker Josh Fox when he brought a camera to an open-to-the-public hearing on the environmentally-destructive practice of hydraulic fracturing, or fracking.  Talia Buford writes on Politico:  Fox was led out in handcuffs by the Capitol police shortly after 10 a.m., before the hearing could be gaveled into order. The "Gasland" director was attempting to film the hearing looking into EPA's investigation of potential water contamination from natural gas drilling in Pavillion, Wyoming ... Fox has been charged with unlawful entry, according to Capitol police spokeswoman Sgt. Kimberly Schneider.  Fox is working on a sequel to his Oscar-nominated "Gasland."

Zach Carter reports for The Huffington Post: 

(T)urning away journalists is extremely rare on Capitol Hill. The rules requiring pre-approval for film crews are designed to prevent hearings from being disrupted by hordes of camera operators. That was not the case for this hearing. Only two cameras requested entrance to the event, which was not crowded.  Subcommittee Chairman Andy Harris (R-Md.) was unavailable for comment, but several Democrats on the committee voiced outrage with the GOP's press blackout.

"I was chair of the Subcommittee for four years, and we frequently had people show up the day of a hearing to film," Rep. Brad Miller (D-N.C.) told HuffPost. "We asked for their name, but they were told if they would not disrupt the hearing, they were free to record. A couple of times staff said, 'You're getting in the way, don't stand there,' but other than that, I do not ever recall anything like this. We certainly never turned anyone away for not providing 24 hours' notice."

"It's an outrageous violation of the First Amendment," Rep. Zoe Lofgren (D-Calif.) told HuffPost. "Here we've got an Academy Award-nominated filmmaker, and it's an important subject and the subject that he did his prior film on for HBO. And they put him in handcuffs and hauled him out of there. This is stunning."

Josh Fox issued the following statement to media outlets:

I was arrested today for exercising my First Amendment rights to freedom of the press on Capitol Hill. I was not expecting to be arrested for practicing journalism. Today's hearing in the House Energy and Environment subcommittee was called to examine EPAs findings that hydraulic fracturing fluids had contaminated groundwater in the town of Pavillion, Wyoming. I have a long history with the town of Pavillion and its residents who have maintained since 2008 that fracking has contaminated their water supply. I featured the stories of residents John Fenton, Louis Meeks and Jeff Locker in GASLAND and I have continued to document the catastrophic water contamination in Pavillion for the upcoming sequel GASLAND 2. It would seem that the Republican leadership was using this hearing to attack the three year Region 8 EPA investigation involving hundreds of samples and extensive water testing which ruled that Pavillion's groundwater was a health hazard, contaminated by benzene at 50x the safe level and numerous other contaminants associated with gas drilling. Most importantly, EPA stated in this case that fracking was the likely cause. 

As a filmmaker and journalist I've covered hundreds of public hearings, including Congressional hearings. It is my understanding that public speech is allowed to be filmed. Congress should be no exception. No one on Capitol Hill should regard themselves exempt from the Constitution. The First Amendment to the Constitution states explicitly "Congress shall make no law...that infringes on the Freedom of the Press". Which means that no subcommittee rule or regulation should prohibit a respectful journalist or citizen from recording a public hearing.  (Read the rest here.)