GOPers Heading to the Elephants' Graveyard

The Non-Sexual Republican Purity Pledge

On the Washington Post, Kathleen Parker writes about the GOP's mass suicide pact:  Some people can't stand prosperity, my father used to say.  Today, he might be talking about Republicans, who, in the midst of declining support for President Obama's hope-and-change agenda, are considering a "purity" pledge to weed out undesirables from their ever-shrinking party.  Just when the independents and moderates were considering revisiting the GOP tent...  Just when the GOP was gaining traction after gubernatorial victories in Virginia and New Jersey, Republicans perform a rain dance at their own garden party...  (C)onservative members of the party have come up with a list of principles they want future candidates to agree to or forfeit backing by the Republican National Committee.  The so-called purity test is a 10-point checklist -- a suicide pact, really -- of alleged Republican positions.  Anyone hoping to play on Team GOP would have to sign off on eight of the 10 -- through their voting records, public statements or a questionnaire.  (Party purity.  Didn't the Soviets require that?)

Below is the Republican Party's Purity List. You'll notice that every statement begins with "We Support," when in actuality, these are mostly things they stand against.  It's a disingenuous attempt to diffuse that "Party of No" label.

(1) We support smaller government, smaller national debt, lower deficits and lower taxes by opposing bills like Obama’s “stimulus” bill;  (We oppose progress, with more tax cuts for the rich!)
(2) We support market-based health care reform and oppose Obama-style government run healthcare;  (Our masters in the Health Industry want to maintain the status quo, and we always obey our masters.)
(3) We support market-based energy reforms by opposing cap and trade legislation;  (Fuck the environment.  Drill, baby, drill.  We'll be gone in a hundred years.  Too bad for our grandkids' kids.)
(4) We support workers’ right to secret ballot by opposing card check;  (Unions are evil.  They tend to vote Democratic.  Protect big business bosses at all costs.)
(5) We support legal immigration and assimilation into American society by opposing amnesty for illegal immigrants;  (Mexicans also tend to vote for Democrats. So NO amnesty.  We believe in border militias, heavily armed.  Tea Party!)
(6) We support victory in Iraq and Afghanistan by supporting military-recommended troop surges;  (War, baby, war.  Kill people.  Make things go boom boom.  Screw the cost.)
(7) We support containment of Iran and North Korea, particularly effective action to eliminate their nuclear weapons threat;  (There must ALWAYS be war.  We should have our enemies queued up, in anticipation of future conflicts.)
(8) We support retention of the Defense of Marriage Act;  (We hate Teh Gays.  We've always hated Teh Gays.  We will always hate Teh Gays.  Cause the Bible tells us so.)
(9) We support protecting the lives of vulnerable persons by opposing health care rationing, denial of health care and government funding of abortion; (The medical industy will remain a profit-driven machine.  We vow to further erode women's reproductive rights.)  and ...
(10) We support the right to keep and bear arms by opposing government restrictions on gun ownership.  (There should be NO PLACE in America where guns are not welcome:  Churches, schools, hospitals, bars, shopping centers, theatres, subways, courtrooms, Democratic political rallies. The NRA is second only to God!) 

Back to Parker:  The list apparently evolved in response to the Republican loss in the recent congressional race in Upstate New York, when liberal Republican Dede Scozzafava withdrew from the race under pressure from conservatives and endorsed Democrat Bill Owens, who won.  Republicans had held that seat for more than a century. 

Republican pols have been heading in this direction for a long time.  Only difference is, their slow march toward the elephants' graveyard has now picked up speed.  Rest In Peace, GOP.

Comments

[Trent]

There's a lot of talk from MSM about how Dems are in trouble for 2010. I just don't buy it. Repugs won't realize their folly till after the midterms... if then.